Be Kind to Yourself (and Breath) as featured in the 2026 spring edition of ACMO’s CM Magazine

Wellness at Work: Be Kind to Yourself (and Breathe)

There is a lot of attention today on mental health and the importance of taking care of ourselves, in all aspects of our lives. I say - It’s about time! As a society, we have not been very good at being kind to ourselves. We’ve carried forward ideologies and work patterns from a different era, and even when we know they no longer serve us, our brains can have a hard time letting go.

The more we talk about mental health and self-care, the more we begin to challenge what was once considered acceptable and redefine what should be the norm. We all know the saying “happy spouse, happy house,” or in a professional context, though it doesn’t roll off the tongue quite as smooth, “healthy culture, healthy outcomes.” And yet, so many of us struggle to give ourselves the same care, attention, and grace we readily extend to others. We forget to pause, reset, and breathe.

We tend to praise resilience, responsiveness, and “pushing through,” without pausing to ask what that costs over time. In many professional environments, especially those built on service, like condo management, landscaping, parking enforcement (the list could go on and on) reliability becomes a badge of honour. The person who answers first, stays late, or always “handles it” is quietly celebrated. There is pride in being dependable, in being the one others count on when things get hard.

Taking time to pause and examine the long-term impact of this belief - that resilience, responsiveness, and “pushing through” are the hallmarks of professional success - rarely happens. The constant state of readiness, the inability to truly disconnect, and the internal pressure to never drop the ball slowly take their toll. What begins as dedication and drive can, over time, turn into quiet depletion, especially when rest and recovery are treated as optional rather than essential. In many cases, burnout doesn’t arrive suddenly; it creeps in slowly, disguised as commitment, professionalism, and simply “doing what needs to be done.”

When I was leading a team, there were many moments when the pace felt relentless. Upset unit owners, unexpected emergencies, yet another garbage chute clog - often layered on top of personal matters team members were quietly carrying. In those moments, I would calmly say, “And we are breathing. And we are breathing.” It was my way of grounding the room, creating a pause, and reminding everyone that they were not alone and that the moment, however stressful, would pass.

To some, it may have sounded a little silly. But over time, something meaningful happened: my team started saying it to one another. It became a shared language and a small ritual that bonded us. Whether the issue was professional or personal, it reinforced the idea that we were in this together and that it was okay to take a breath and be kind to ourselves.

That phrase - be kind to yourself - is something I often said and still do. It is advice that sounds simple yet is surprisingly difficult to follow. We are quick to show compassion to colleagues and friends, but far slower to offer the same grace inward. My husband will sometimes ask me, “What would you tell me if the roles were reversed?” He knows the answer before I say it. It is a gentle reminder, and almost permission, to pause and be kind to myself.

From a condominium management perspective, this message matters deeply. Managers routinely navigate multiple high-stress situations at once, regulatory obligations, financial stewardship, competing expectations, and the reality that emergencies do not respect evenings or weekends. The work is meaningful. We are entrusted with peoples’ homes and, for some, their largest investment, but it is also unending.

Here is a hard truth: the to-do list will never reach zero. There will always be another email, another issue, another follow-up. That is precisely why managers need to be reminded that they are human. It is not only acceptable, but necessary, to step away, to shut off notifications, and to rest. And just as importantly, managers need to know that their peers and leadership have their backs - not just in words, but in practice.

The familiar airline instruction to put on your own oxygen mask before helping others applies here as well. A manager experiencing significant burnout cannot serve their community, their corporation, their families, or themselves as effectively as they could if they were supported in maintaining their own wellbeing.

If I had one piece of advice to offer, it would be this: be kind to yourself and breathe. At the end of the day, turn the notifications off. Put the work computer away. Do what brings you joy or helps you reset. Spend time with family and friends. Read. Walk. Write. Laugh. Whatever it might be. For me, it might be snuggling down with a good book, writing the next chapter in the book I have been trying to write for way too many years now, or being the occasional clown who makes those around me laugh.

The work will be there tomorrow.

You need to be, too.